I am Bonnie Rose, an ordained minister. One day last year I showed my hole in church.
It’s not as bad as it sounds. I was about to teach a class and was wearing a faded brown turtleneck. One of my teaching assistants noticed a quarter-sized hole, above my left shoulder blade. I didn’t have access to a change of clothing, so I entered the classroom thinking, “I’ll just keep my back to the wall.”
The evening progressed and Ruth**, one of our students said, “Reverend Bonnie, I’d like to get to know you better.” I contemplated her request. Then I deliberately turned and showed her my hole.
The next week, Ruth returned to class and told me that my humble hole changed her life. She shared that she had been wounded by overly-perfected, uptight clergy. She cherished the notion that a minister with a powerful life-affirming message could have a hole – and possibly other flaws and shortcomings as well.
The showing of the hole was a pivotal moment in my life and ministry as well. Somehow, a moth, an old turtleneck, a slightly irreverent Reverend with poor grooming skills, and an intuitive student conspired to reveal the truth. Yes, the mystery conspired to teach me that sacredness does not exist in spite of our holes. Sacredness exists within our holes. Our holes are holy.
Yet we run from our own psycho-spiritual black holes – the things we do not wish to see, the things we hate about ourselves, the things we have deemed unacceptable to God.
We don’t have to do that anymore. It’s time to learn to live in the joy of being human and divine. It’s time to embrace our weirdness with our wonder. It’s time to fall in love with the holes in everything to call forth wholeness.
Here’s a warning: The name of this blog is Holy Chit. Chit is a Sanskrit term for “Consciousness.” I think of it as the true consciousness that infuses all of existence, not just the dainty parts. You should probably avoid this blog if you are offended by farts or an occasional F-word. You shouldn’t read it if you don’t want to get a little dirty on your path to purity. I am a former nurse and opera singer. Nurses and opera singers tend to be earthy.
On the other hand, you should read this blog if you want to live in the creaky, edgy, crazy world of non-dual existence. If you have tried in the past to fix yourself, come here to learn that you are not broken. If you are trying to pimp-slap yourself into self-improvement, I will invite you to explore self-acceptance. And if you think that God is beyond your reach, I will challenge you to see God in everything including the darkest parts of yourself.
I look forward to sharing a transformational journey with you. Let us begin, so you can fall in love with your wHole Life.
** All names are changed and/or used with permission.